one minute thoughts..

so.here i am, still summing up the guts to go online and blogging when infact, i have a party to attend at 7pm, a hair and make up appointment with my mom's stylist at 3:30pm and a phone call i have to make for my dad in a few minutes.

to make matters worse, i haven't even asked someone to iron the dress i'm gonna wear.

oh geesh.my mom would definitely throw a fit when she finds out i'm still at home, slacking off--big time, unshowered with barely nothing accomplished.

she's at work right now. but then again, with the technology we have these days (and not to mention the kind of housekeepers we get to hire), she'll instantly know that i'm still infront of the computer.

anyway.

the debutante for this night is one of my good friends from the best years of my life (aka highschool)...KAREN M.BORJA.Ü

i'm quite excited.and i should be, coz i missed 2 school days just so i could come to her special night.

hahaha.seriously, i wouldn't miss it for the world coz she's one of my dearest friends and i'd feel awfully down if i won't be there.

actually, i almost wasn't able to attend because of the torture known as school, but i thought to myself, "hey, this comes onnce in an entire lifetime, so why not take the risk and go?"

i could handle the few days missed anyway.

i think.

besides, they haven't probably done much in 2 days.not in rational pyschology...or statistics...or biology...or rc...or ca...

right?right?RIGHT?

...

i guess i'd better get up my lazy butt now.i have the strongest feeling that my mom's gonna call me in a few seconds.better prepare myself for the fireworks.

so much for one minute.

the runway ahead.

here's the thing:

i am my own person.i don't need to compromise who and what i am in order to be successful nor to live up to other people's expectations.

like i always say:

I AM NOT HERE TO FEED YOUR EGO..I'M HERE FOR MYSELF.

(i should definitley have this statement copyrighted and trademarked, coz after all, it is my idea.i was the one who said it.and i have been hearing a LOT of dumb bitches saying the same thing.hey, i should be taking the credit, don't you think???)

anyway.do you ever get the feeling that you're surrounded by traitors and back stabbing hoes?

well,it's what i feel constantly every now and then.

paranoid much?not really.

it's just that, when you live in a world where everybody seems so insecure and full of themselves, you need to have your defenses up.otherwise, they're gonna eat you up and spit you out without a second guess.

am i right?

...

okay,okay.i know it's too early in the year to be hating on somebody.it's the new year, after all.we all have these resolutions (that we don't get to do anyway so why bother??) and vows to be good, to be nicer, to lose/gain weight...

but you know what?

F*** resolutions.

F*** promises.

F*** those people who swore that they're gonna be there for you but they'll just leave you like a load of crap in the end.

grr.thinking about people on the verge of pretense seriously makes me want to gag.

so you must be sitting there and reading this thing and saying to yourselves,
"whoa, this girl has got some issues.."

and yeah, crap, i do have issues.everybody does.can't i just drown in my own misery for just a minute and not feel any worse about myself for just a second?

sheesh.

it's effing depressing, that you just wanna leave that life behind, but then, all of a sudden, it pops up once again, uninvited, and you're back to square one.

COME ON.seriously.that was so high school.can't we all move on and live in peace?

i'm sorry you're that insecure to actually bring it up again.and i'm sorry that you never shined like i did when we were still younger.and i'm so sorry that we ever crossed paths again.

it's not my fault that we were coincidentally in the same place at the same time.

alright?

so don't act like we used to friends.don't act like you don't have anything against me.and don't you dare pretend that everything is okay between us.

i know i don't.i never did.

so please just spare us both the drama.

you've proven your point. you are that good of an actress.i never gave you enough credit for it.

well, here goes, as you wished:

bravo.

...

*sighs*

i just never really get used to the prospect of people who just wants a favor from me.

...

anyway.enough of the more depressing news.

what is in store for me for the year ahead?

i dunno.i've never been much of a planner.i do things spontaneously.i take them as they are or i do drastic measures to improve it here and there.

one thing's for sure, though:

i will learn how to study people before i let them in my life.i could no longer afford any more hurt.i've been through enough of it already.

...

about the title:

"the runway ahead.."

yes, industrially speaking, i am talking about the runway that models walk on during fashion shows.

(cherie knows about this more than anyone else:)

i am a frustrated fashion model wanna-be/fashion designer.

i live in my own world of color and prints.i am my worst critique.

>i undergo through bad fashion sense every now and then...

>i sometimes trip while walking...

>i hear people bringing me down...

but it's not all that matters.

what's important is that:

>i look and feel good with what i'm wearing...

>i recover from a very bad fall with my head up high and still look confident...

>and i don't mind what other people say or think...

at the end of the day, i just live in my own fantasy and still afford to be happy.

the world is my runway and i am on my own fashion show...

after party...

still feeling a huge sense of hang over because of our win in the broadquest, our class celebrated our victory at the usual party place: ron's crib. hehe.

our next destination was at school for the paskuhan.overall, it was tons better than last year.the fireworks display was gorgeous!:p it was very festive and fun.although globe refused to cooperate because the signal was so obviously hacked, we had fun.

parokya ni edgar was great!:) i love you chito.astig.

then, it was gimmik time. it was sad that mafe wasn't able to come, but, there's always next time.

so it was me, sheena, celine, cherry and kristine who had the time of our lives somewhere in tomas morato.:)

we went clubbin' at barrakz.hahaha.cool.sobra.

while we were dancing, having a good time, there were these two guys who obviously wanted to dance with us.but we thought better of it and ignored them.

so, they just went away and danced witht this girl, who was, in cherry's term:

"BISAKLAT."

=))

i am seriously regretting what we did. they were hot pa naman sana.hahahaha.

already tired and feeling sleepy for the day's drama,our next stop was at starbucks in abscbn compound. ayun, picture picture...vanilla cream grande for me...picture ulet...then crashed sheena's home na.

ang lakas ng loob namin na magbar hopping last night.super lakad lang, finding a nice place to chill out.ayun, barrakz lang pala ulit bagsak namin.=))

what an adventure guys,i had so much fun.let's do it again next time.next destination: THE FORT.okay?hehehe

DECEMBER 19,2007

this date is seriously a milestone...not just for us in our block, but for ALL communication arts students.

in this year's broadquest, our class proved that we can break traditions and go an extra mile further in doing great things.

as some of my blockmates have probably written in their online diaries, our class was THE production house of the year. we also won the award for being the original in terms of the concept, which was very unexpected because the other classes also produced wonderful outputs.

sobrang worth it yung pagod, puyat at mga tampuhan.

i don't need to say much because everything that there is to be said has been expressed yesterday.

we are definitely humbled by our victory.

so in gratitude, i would like to mention some people:

>CHARMAINE-the ever talented and responsible president of our class...meng, we definitely would have been crumbling down to pieces if you weren't there to give us the proper motivation and drive to do all of those things.you shouted, screamed, became frustrated at all of us but for the right reasons. hands down to you my dear. it's never a dull moment working with you. keep on inspiring souls like us so that we'll know how much we shine like you do.

>CHARLOTTE-the dynamic "direk tart" and my beloved friendy. no words can ever build up the proper statement on how much you've done for this project. there were hardships along the way, but nevertheless, you always smiled at the end of the work to boost our morale.

>JAMELLE-without you, there would be no concept, without you, there would have been no SIGLO, the winning piece of our class.

>TO MY BELOVED BITCHES, THE MAD DOGS (2CA1)- guys,this is it. we broke the jinx.we've proven that belonging in this class is not completely malas and a waste.you guys all did a great job.*pat your backs* everyone helped out through the best that they can and we all contributed for the betterment of our production, i am definitely looking forward to more sleepless nights, tears and triumphs with each of you.love you guys 2ca1.:)

...

icing on the cake:

one of the judges, who works for ABS CBN loved our output so much that he actually asked for the CD and the script of our work.

guys, first step victory, next step FAME.:)

ahoo!ahoo!ahoo!:p

once upon a dream...

( a blog tribute to the star that was...Britney Spears)

okay, okay...
i make it sound like she died or something.but the truth is, when someone who's as famous as her experiences the "dying fame limbo", she's as good as a dead carcass anyway.
right?
so anyway, let me begin this eulogy for her, who was once my idol.:)

...

growing up, i was the BIGGEST britney fan EVER.
(i swear to god, i really was.and now, looking back on how mediocre i seemed to be, i feel soo embarrased about myself. )

i have ALL her albums, i have ALL possible magazines and tabloids that contained her, i saw ALL her concerts (though not live) and i watched her grab the trophies that all award giving bodies ever gave out during the time she was still the "it" girl of our generation.

in short, i worshipped the ground she stepped on, which, i think, most of the female teenage population did as well.

when britney was starting out, she was barely 18.she was young, carefree and innocent. she was surrounded by all these people who adored her and showered her with things that most girls her level usually get at an older age.

imagine having a triple platinum label in your name at age, what? 19?

it was, if truth be told, virtually impossible to achieve whatever she has acquired at such a tender age. and no one has been born yet that can topple over her reigning glory.

so, okay, a multi-million dollar insurance to your name, a spot in the hollywood walk of fame and millions of screaming fans all over the world isn't all that, is it?

not when controversies seem to surround you everywhere you go.

britney, although she was the goddess of all teen popstars a few years ago, she was forever condemened and followed around by paparazzis everywhere she went. she was called various names and attached to all sorts of controveries that practically ruined her ego.

there was the issue with justin timberlake, the movie "crossroads" (which, according to most people, was a major major flop), the said rivalry between her and christina aguilera, and the list just goes on and on...

but the most hurtful gossip of all would have been the issue with her mom, who was reportedly said to have been using her own daughter to pay off their family debts and who was just using the fame and glory to benefit her own selfish desires.

ever wonder how britney underwent the painful transition of a teeny bopper-ish young girl into a full time slut material?

it was said that her own mom somehow coerced her to change her image from time to time in order to "serve" the changing needs of the demanding industry that she was a part of.

yep.this is true.

her mom was behind the skimpy tops and barely there outfits.

this was much to the disapproval of britney, ofcourse, who was more apt about doing what she loved best, which was performing.

fast forward to a few years...

and then came kevin federline...

who was the man that everyone thought would be with her forever...

after her painful break up with justin...kevin was the last person that she needed in her jumbled web of confusion and agony.

i won't go into detail about what happened in her life during these hard years since much has already been said about it.

it's too painful to describe it anyway.

...

so now we all gather here to commemorate the life of britney jean spears...

a life that was probably lived in joy (at most times).

a satisfactory performer, a controversial diva, but nonetheless a good person at heart.

she doesn't deserve to go where the roads of fame lead her.she doesn't deserve to be criticized as well...

but then again, that's what showbusiness is all about anyway, right?

the glitz, the glamour and the fame are all but temporary...

in the end, we'll all go to that one place where serenity awaits to embrace us all.

goodbye britney, you live in the hearts of those who loved you...

she was a young girl who only dreamed of the stars...
and now, that's where she's at...
all the fame is now a memory...

tired but happy...

• academics.
• broadquest shoot.
• papers.
• pressure.
• expectations.
• delibs.
• MMAB staffer work.

...this is a typical day in my life these days. sometimes, it makes me even stop, wonder and say, "what the eff??! how did i get soo busy???where was i when the world suddenly decided to put all the work load on me??"

but when i enter my beloved room 113 and see 37 other poor souls like me, it makes the "busy-ness" less felt. i mean, we're all in this together, right?

**emo**

yuck,hahaha.

well, even though we're all practically dying because of the stuff we have to do, i'm very happy.

it's because...i'm falling for...:X

...PREDATORA.

oh no.i'm kidding.=))

**i seriously wanna laugh right now.out loud**

my wish list...

i'm super excited.may exchange gift kami sa block namin and i wonder who got me?lol

well, whoever you are,i'm posting my wishlist so you would have an idea what to get me...:)

novels:

>the mermaid chair by sue monk kidd
>mermaid park by beth mayall
>a countess below stairs and a song for summer both by eva ibbotson
>exit here by jason myers
>angel's choice by lauren baratz logsted
>maybe a miracle by brian strause
>the ship of brides by jojo moyes
>the virgin of small plains by nancy pickard

favorite cartoon characters:

>care bears:)
>mickey mouse
>hello kitty

here comes the more expensive stuff i want to get...

>the scent of paris hilton
>fantasy by britney


hahaha.i'm not demanding,though.simple things make me happy naman eh. just wrap up my loved one in one big box of gold, okay na.hahahaha